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In Memory of Kerstin Tellander

Born 1943 – Died first week in January 2002

Kerstin Tellander

Kerstin, above about 16 years old, at her family's farm in Arboga. She was there for the summer. Photo by Nini who visited and saw live pigs for the first time in my life. Even saw how the pigs were slaughtered....(or rather, heard).

Nini and Kerstin

Me and Kerstin, year unknown

How I remember Kerstin

Kerstin and I got to know each other in our early teens. I don't remember how, but we lived rather close to each other. Kerstin and I went a lot to the movies in those years. Sometimes twice the same day. We both loved Elvis Presley and rock music.

Kerstin was much "wilder" than I was and she was always out and always seeing a lot of boys. We actually didn't have much in common. She got her first daughter when she was 17. I know she got two more later, but we were out of touch for a long time apart from some phonecalls, long between each.

The years passed and I had no idea where she was or what she did. She then suddenly phoned me when we were around 50 years old and wanted to meet. So we met a couple of times and then kept a sporadic contact by phone. We still didn't have much in common and not that much to talk about. She felt old and didn't seem to have much interest in anything really. That's the impression I got. I also had a feeling that she was envious of me and what I do for a living and the way of life I live. She said she felt so much older than me – when we actually were the same age.

She phoned me the last time on Saturday afternoon before Christmas 2001 and we talked for some time. As usual we were talking about calling back and that we ought to meet but didn't set any date for it. I said I'd call her.

About two weeks later one of her daughters called me to tell me that Kerstin had died a week before. They had found my telephonenumber in her phonebook. They didn't know how she died and why, and if they got to know it later, I do not know. It was a chock though to hear that she just died. Just like that. I have a feeling that she simply didn´t want to live any longer and gave up somehow. It feels really sad.

Kerstin 1958

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